Obituary of Carl Sabety Baker

Carl Sabety Baker Rochester: April 2, 2010, at age 81. Like the warrior he always was, Carl battled his cancer to the very end. Carl leaves behind his beloved best friend and devoted former wife, Janis Granite Baker. He was the adored and cherished father to his children, Florence & husband, Trey Stadler, Steven (Elizabeth) Baker and the proud and very best "Papoo" to his loving grandson, Aaron Stadler. Carl was the "Chairman of the Board" of his wonderful group of golf buddies. He will forever be remembered by his dearest friends including Bill (Ethel) Farash, Sandford Appelbaum, Milt Axelrod, Aubie Danker, Herbie Derman, Harry Gan, Milton Jachles, Manny Lazerson, Sheldon Mills, Phil Weinstein, his very special cousins Teddy & Lee Baker, and his "almost brother" Julie Lee. Carl will be greatly missed by his sister-in-law Ruth Baker, brother-in-law Gabriel Cassorla, and his dear nephews and nieces. In addition to his loving family members and friends, Carl was fortunate to have caring Rawlinson Road neighbors: Tony and Josie Cuva, and Mary and Marizzio Picone. Carl is predeceased by his parents, Sabety and Estraya Baker, brothers, Jack, Phil, and Sol; sisters, Dora Levy and Sarah Cassorla and nephews, Irwin Baker and Jack Levy. Born in 1928, Carl graduated from East High School where he was a star basketball player. Carl was a University of Rochester alumni and a member of the Army Medical Corps during the Korean War. He and his brothers were the owners of Baker Brothers' Scrap Iron & Metal and of Monarch Mufflers. Carl was a fine athlete with a passion for golf and a marvelous dancer, especially with his dearest Janis. Carl was the strong Patriarch of his family, who he showered with his generous love and who brought him much pride and happiness. Our hearts are broken at his passing, but we know that we were blessed to have him in our lives. The strength of spirit he has shown throughout his life and especially over these past painful months has filled us with admiration. Carl will forever remain in the hearts of all who knew him as the most devoted and loving father, grandfather, uncle, and friend. When you think of our darling Carl, remember to smile and pass on a joke, as he always did. Heartfelt gratitude for the care & compassion Carl received from his dedicated doctors, Dr.Leo Stornelli,, Dr. Zachary Kramer, and Dr. Alexander Kurchin, the staff at Lifetime Care and by the fifth floor staff at The Jewish Home. Funeral Services will be held on Wednesday, April 7, 2010 at 11 AM at Brighton Memorial Chapel, Inc., 3325 Winton Road South. Click here for directions. Interment, Britton Road Cemetery. Following the funeral, a reception will follow from 2-5 PM at Locust Hill Country Club, 2000 Jefferson Road. Click here for directions. In lieu of flowers, please consider donations to Jewish Home Foundation 2021 Winton Road South Rochester, New York 14618 Link to the Jewish Home Foundation or a charity of your choice. Eulogy given at the funeral: My Favorite Father Anything I can do for you? Do you need anything? How many of you here have heard those words from my Father? Besides his family and golfing, Dad loved to shop for bargains. If onions were on sale, he would buy 30 pounds and call to tell me about his good deal & ask if I needed any onions. I would say, “Dad, how many onions can you use?” He’d reply, “ I use them for cooking”, which he enjoyed doing and did well. When I was cleaning out his refrigerator, you better believe that I found lots of onions. Of course, we are finding lots of lots of stuff in that house. In my 58 years, I have never had an automobile that Dad did not give me or help me buy. His frequent words to the salesman, were” Can you sharpen the pencil a little?” When he would call and leave a message on my answering machine, he would say, “Florence, call your favorite Father” And I would leave a message for him, “Dad, call your favorite daughter.” After Dad got sick and he would come to our home, I would walk him out to his car as he was leaving. As he pulled out of the driveway, he would roll down the window And always sing, “You’re gonna miss me, Baby.” It is fitting that Dad’s funeral is on a Wednesday. As long as I can remember Dad took Wednesday afternoons off to play golf or in later years during the winter to have lunch with the guys. Dad was with friends on Wednesdays. Dad was so happy when not only me, but also his grandson, Aaron, took up golf and we all golfed together. For me to be able to spend time with my Dad on the golf course was the ultimate good time. “No peeking” I remember Dad coming home from working long days in first the junkyard and then the muffler shop I would see his big hands - cut & bruised & dirty from working so hard. He would go to the basement and scrub his hands with a stiff brush and lava soap. I was always proud of those hands because they showed how hard Dad worked to give his family a good life. Years ago, when I was in grade school, the teacher had us all stand up and tell the class what our fathers did for a living. I stood up with pride and declared, “ My Father owns a junk yard!” And as my mother Janis, the love of Dad’s life, always says, “ You’re Father was a junk man to the very end”. Lastly, I came across these words in a book entitled; “The Final Exam” and I find them to be somewhat comforting. So if you need me, call & I will come. Though you can’t see or touch me, I’ll be near. And if you listen with your heart, You will hear my love around you, strong & clear. And then, when you must come this way alone, I’ll be waiting with a smile and say, “Welcome Home” A Eulogy for my father, Carl Sabety Baker I’ve heard that the children of famous great men, especially their sons, often have had a bad time of it. I remember reading that one of Gandhi’s sons had this terrible life, and I thought, “Sure— I can imagine. His father was the ‘Savior of the Nation,’ and I have a hard enough time following in the footsteps of my Dad, who was a junkman, and had a muffler shop with his two brothers.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought, “If only I were half as tough as the old man, all my problems would be solved.” And my father was not unaware of his strength. Many times over these last few months, when we would speak together, and he would talk to me honestly about his condition, he would always end with, “But I’m a tough, old junkman.” And, like all good things, sometimes that toughness wasn’t easy. There were times, especially in my teens and early twenties, when my Dad and I would mix it up a little. But like a lot of fathers and sons, the roots of any conflict were usually in how alike we were. He could be stubborn, and so could I. They often say that the measure of a man’s life is in how he ends it. And here, my father filled me with awe. In the last few months, as the bad days grew more and more— it only made him appreciate whatever good days he had, more and more. Whatever there was left of life for him to enjoy and appreciate, he wanted it. And just simple things: going out for a drive by himself for half an hour. A day when his appetite was good, and my brother-in-law, Trey Stadler, took him out to Schaller’s for a steak sandwich. When he told me about it, my Dad, who was not prone to gushing, said, “What a wonderful, wonderful son-in-law” Trey was. All of this going on with him, and he was filled with love and gratitude for the simplest things. In this, I see G-d. In Dallas, my rabbi, Joseph Menashe, told a Biblical anecdote that I’ve found useful. On Mt. Sinai, when G-d spoke to Moses from out of the burning bush, in some ways, it was a little thing. After all the spectacular miracles of the Exodus: the pillar of fire, the parting of the Red Sea— Moses thinks he’s alone on Mt. Sinai. He hears a voice, and he looks around, and there’s this small bush. And that’s where G-d is. The lesson that Rabbi Menashe wants us to take from this story is this: you can find G-d in little things. In my brother-in-law taking my Dad out for a steak sandwich— I see the presence of G-d. In my Dad savoring the simplest things as the most precious gifts— I see the presence of G-d. And, when I see all of you gathered here, some from great distances, all to honor the memory of a good, hard-working man— I see the presence of G-d. -- Steven Carl Baker To leave an email message of condolence please click on "ADD MEMORIAL" below. Home Rochester, New York Birthplace Rochester, New York